Creepy children are some of the creepiest creeps to ever creep me out. :)I really like your description, especially how you call him "maniacal" from the get go.
You managed to really infused the 1st paragraph with a desolate feel. "Seryn stood alone in the midst of all these lost dreams; her thoughts spinning around her like the sand blowing across her feet." Nice!
Ooooh the descriptions were beautiful and dreamy and the boy really creepy! The last line was such a tease!! I want to know more! :)
ReplyDeleteOh man. This is eerie, and the last line is totally creepy. Eek, shudder worthy! Nice job!
ReplyDeleteWhaaaaaaat?! This is creepy! Me likey. :D
ReplyDeleteReally creepy. And I love the description of his laughter, and how the narrative views it as being separate from the evil little brat's smile.
ReplyDeleteOooo!!! Creepy and the descriptions were so vivid!
ReplyDeleteI heart creepy stuff! The discriptions and his laugh hooked me! Great job :)
ReplyDeleteOh wow! Very, very creepy :D Good job!
ReplyDeleteFreakily creepy! Whoa, you know nothing good will come after feeling chills in a story.
ReplyDeleteCreepy children are some of the creepiest creeps to ever creep me out. :)I really like your description, especially how you call him "maniacal" from the get go.
ReplyDeleteOMG--CREEPY! It starts out kinda nostalgic and sad, then quickly hits creepy mode, lol...nice!
ReplyDeleteYeah, that last comment was totally from me. Don't ask. *sigh* :)
ReplyDeleteSo creepy/spectacular!
ReplyDeleteOooh, I hope it's about to take a turn for the magical.
ReplyDeleteOh, super creepy, especially that last line. Nice tease!
ReplyDeleteYou managed to really infused the 1st paragraph with a desolate feel. "Seryn stood alone in the midst of all these lost dreams; her thoughts spinning around her like the sand blowing across her feet." Nice!
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